Although a substantial portion of us are introverted and pranks are associated with attention-getting extroverts, the reality is that a lot of us introverts love a well-played prank.
We can have a wickedly quiet sense of humor, and this is the time of year for that tendency to come out and shine. With April Fools Day coming up, here are ten ways to pull a literary prank on your favorite book-loving friend. (With thanks to Ginni Chen over at Barnes and Noble blog for some of the ideas used, you can find her article here.)
No books were harmed in the making of this list.
Seriously, if you hurt the books be prepared for us to break out a level of crazy you haven’t seen since the last time you interrupted us while reading. These pranks are all about the good-natured fun.
1. If you have access to a number they don’t know, text them the first few sentences of a book they’ll never read. Then text that they have been signed up for “A Novel in A Month” messaging service. Pretend not to understand their desperate requests to “cancel subscription”.
2. Change their five main phone contacts names to characters from a book. George R.R. Martin has like a thousand confusing ones to choose from, the only problem will be picking which names to use.
Side note: no one deserves to be labeled Ramsay. That’s just going too far.
3. Tell them (or write up and send an official looking notice) that all of the books by their favorite author have been recalled for causing grievous paper cuts because they are “so engrossing that they cause readers to turn pages recklessly and are a hazard to public safety.”
4. If you’re feeling artsy and have lots of time, print out fake book jackets for their books with fun made up names. (“Good-Bye Vas Deferens: A Little Golden Book Guide to Vasectomy” “Fancy Coffins You Can Make Yourself” “The Beginner’s Guide to Human Sacrifice and the Raising of Demons”).
Find printable templates here at Bound By Nothing.
5. Text them random Shakespearean insults. Definitely, do this with no warning or context.
6. Convince them that you bought Snake Eyes: A Nicolas Cage Activity Book to give them as a gift. The best part is that this book actually exists. I’m not saying you should buy it for real, but if you do please post a screenshot of their reaction. For scientific purposes.
7. Move the first book on their Favorites Shelf to the last position. Don’t move it so far away as a different shelf, just to the wrong place on the Shelf of Favored Authors. See how long it takes them to notice.
It might take a while for them to want to re-read that particular book, but I guarantee you they will find out. Tell me in the comments how long it took, the winner for least amount of time gets a big virtual high five from all of us here at BRMW.
8. Give them a Harry Potter themed day without warning them first. Make butterbeer (recipe via I Heart Naptime here).
Write “The Chamber of Secrets has been opened” on their bathroom mirror in red lipstick.
Wear a robe and demand that they join you in your fashion choices because Hogwarts has a uniform dress code (extra points if you already own a pointy hat).
Quote the books at them whenever possible and insist that they use the Accio spell whenever they want you to give them something.
9. Convince them that their favorite novel is being turned into a movie, by the completely wrong director, and with terrible casting choices.
Do they love YA? Michael Bay will be directing their favorite with Quentin Tarantino writing the script and Steve Buscemi will be starring. Sit back and enjoy their outrage.
10. Write the word “Plot” on a strip of paper and twist it up. If they change their mind about any decision during the day, hand them the twisted piece of paper.
Wait for them to get the pun.